Can’t believe it’s nearly a month since I last wrote anything here….. does that mean I am not sick anymore? I wonder about that if I got the all clear am I still sick? Sick in the head well I know that always been sick there, but sick no I don’t think so.
Since I spoke to you last there has been a lot of hospital visits to pump up my boob. Its amazing the way technology works. In my old boob there is a thing called an expander which they pump up every few weeks to start the form of my new boob. I went in for the first one around 3 weeks ago. I met with the plastic surgeon and she was checking my scars etc. she asked me if I thought my scar was healing well. Seriously how would I know I have never had a boob cut off before or a scar on my body…… she seemed to think it was healing fine and all is good. Lay down on the bed for my first injection, there is a little magnet in my boob and a magnet in my file at the hospital she runs the magnet over the boob and finds the other magnet then they know where to inject the fluid. They injected 50ml into me was a very strange feeling and a bit unpleasant. I texted a friend of mine before I went in to see if it hurt she said no not really just don’t look at the needle – what did I do? looked at the needles a big huge syringe – well it looked huge to me anyhow. First pump over wasn’t too bad didn’t come out looking like Dolly Parton or anything but one step at a time I suppose. The following week had another one this time it was extremely painful as my whole arm went numb and I could feel the fluid going down my arm I think the (gobshite) doctor missed the spot and my arm got injected instead. What a waste of a trip drove in waited two hours and the doctor pumped my arm instead of my boob.
Moving right along got another pump a week later and this time it was 100mls and it all went smoothly and felt like the fluid went into the right place. Had a lovely doctor seriously cute like the kind you see on ER he was so nice as well and I said was hoping for another fill next week. He sat me down and told me to take it easy and that I must have patience and not rush into this. He said we should leave all the filling until after radiation as when boob hits radiation no one really knows what is going to happened. As I mentioned before with the sort of reconstruction I am having there is a risk that it will all flop (not that there is anything there to flop) but I don’t dwell on thinking that it’s not going to work – IT IS
I must say this week in particular I have been in great form and feeling really good in myself and not in any pain or discomfort whatsoever. First week in a long time I had nothing to do with cancer, no hospital appointments no doctors pure bliss. The ole brain seems to be getting back to normality I was able to sit down on my PC and actually concentrate for more than a minute. This “chemo brain” as its called is a very strange thing to explain it’s basically a total lack of concentration and I am a go getter and get things done since this hit me I look blankly at things thinking I should do that…. but later then later I say I should have done that!!! Anyhow feeling fab and was literally thinking God its great not to think about cancer when phone rang it was the hospital and the oncology nurse saying that they should have been in touch before that I need to go in and start my new regime of tablets anti-hormone pills. Back to normality with a crash I have to take medication for the next five years a pill called Tamoxifen some people have a lot of side effects on it and I don’t like the thoughts of being on something for five years but hey if it keeps me healthy I can handle that. It’s just strange though you think your out of the woods and you’re not really its all about trying to handle what I have had and make sure the bastard doesn’t come back.
My next step is radio therapy. I start on the 8th July and before this I will have a big CT scan where they will mark where exactly they are going to zap this is done by way of a tiny tattoo marking (thinks its two actually). Radio therapy doesn’t have the same after effects of chemo thank God so I wont feel sick from it. They did say that it is tiring and my boob can get burned so I have to be really careful and lather on the E45 cream all the time to make sure its kept moisturised. I have to do six weeks of this daily its 30 sessions all in all not looking forward to the daily grind of doing it and it ruling my life for six weeks. However no doubt I will meet some more great characters there which is always a bonus. When last in hospital I went back to the chemo room to see if any of my old friends were there and spent a pleasant hour chatting to the ones that were. They didn’t recognise me at first due to my hair style was great seeing you all and keep up that great spirit and destroy this bastard.
Ten months now since I was first diagnosed can’t believe that I have been in the cancer time warp so long now. Its been “the best of times and the worst of times” and still reckon it was bequeathed to me for a reason, just have to figure out what that reason is Ahh I reckon it’s all my new friends one lucky woman I am to be both alive and to have so many great friends.
I have been working away on our blogs big charity event the Dip in the Nip which is taking place Saturday 22nd June. Deep breaths…… every time I talk about these two beautiful girls I well up which I am doing at the moment. We are currently around 130 ladies signed up now to do the Dip in Wicklow so far online we have raised roughly €5k my goal is €10k and by hook or by crook I am going to get it and I don’t care who I blackmail or bully This blog is not my blog its our blog you guys have been through this with me and I need your help. The main help is getting more lovely ladies to do the Dip as the more people we have doing it the more money we get for the girls. Next is I want you to please donate anything you can afford to the girls at www.idonate.ie/kickingtheshiteoutofcancer .
Both of the girls are extremely ill with rare forms of cancer they need to get the proper treatment to have a chance of surviving. I can only imagine the pain Lily-Mae and Leah have gone through during the past year with their endless chemo and radiation and being poked and prodded and basically just feeling so sick. Disgracefully Ireland can’t offer them the treatment and they are fund raising to get treatment overseas. In Leah’s case they must have the funding up front before she can travel to London to give her a chance, it’s no mean feat they need €250k and so far they have raised roughly €100k. God I wish I was a billionaire and give them the money they need – if you know of anyone that is please tell them to help
Thanks in advance folks for your help – ladies if you are worried about your size, shape etc.etc. who cares we are all women we have from a size 8 to a size 26 doing it. Don’t sweat the small things in life its only flesh! I’m doing it with one boob okay blackmail over.
Good things that have happened
- We featured in a great article in Irish Parent Magazine of how my kids dealt with cancer
- There was a week of glorious weather
- Had great day yesterday with Sinead going around Wicklow getting the beach sorted and doing a Trial Run for Dip in the Nip
- Didn’t have to go into hospital at all this week
- I’m cancer free (did I mention that before)
- Some great people helping me out with the Dip, Sinead, Adele and Patrick big thanks
- Had a great trip to Cork for Elaine Lavertys hen what a laugh we had
- Great night at Patricks 50th
- My brain is somewhat functioning again
That’s all folks – hope all is good with you guys – have fun and don’t sweat the small things