Finally its Fabulous February

Seriously didn’t January this year seem like it had 55 days instead of 31?  Such a boring and depressing month and the weather didnt help.  February at last and can see a few things budding….. is there a hint of Spring?

This chemo must have been the worst so far,  by Sunday I was totally wrecked and not sleeping wasnt helping either.  Every part of my body was in pain from head to toe could nearly feel the chemo eating away at the good and bad cells.  Monday and Tuesday the only thing I managed to do was drop the kids to school and the odd email and was in bed for both of the days.  Thanks to Ger who looked after the kids for me both afternoons I would be lost without you.  Even in the evening would try get up but after a while on the couch would find myself back in bed again.  Wednesday was another very long day and was really sad that day heard some terrible news that a lady I knew on Facebook that had been battling cancer for years had passed away.  It felt so sudden just to see it on her page the RIP notices.   Rest in Peace Gail you are now no longer in pain.

So a very morbid, painful and sad first few days.  Also within myself I am seriously looking like a rabbit caught in the spotlight and I don’t like it.  I look sick (I think I do, even though everyone politely says I don’t) it’s the whole no eyelashes thing that makes me look sort of naked and no eyebrows don’t help either but am getting pretty good at drawing.  Also starting to lose my toenails how gross is that ewwwww :-(  I look like the sick people who I flippantly commented on when I first started chemo when I went in all cocky with a full head of hair and a bag full of fight.  Hoping Elaine from UpToMyEyes gonna sort me out tomorrow and see if we can get some sort of lashes on me and a new pair of brows :-)   You might think it sounds very vain, I am not a vain person whatsoever but I do have an issue going around and looking sick – its bad enough feeling it but to have to look it too – no way Jose.

Picked up on Thursday and went to meet the lovely Anita from DolledUp to discuss the competition I won (which all of you helped me win thanks a million).  We had a lovely brekkie and basically I will meet their style and image person first in Dundrum SC and she will go through my style (which to be honest is non-existent)  what is good for me clothes wise, colour wise etc.etc. and I might be getting a loan of a Karen Millen dress for the photo shoot!  Then myself and my sis will go down to Dunboyne Castle for a day of pampering in our white robes, next morning the style team, photographer, make-up artist come down to the hotel and start “working” on me – wow how much fun will that be can’t wait.  I just hope myself and Mia are back from the residents bar before they arrive ;-)    Gonna make it a baldy photo shoot so I can remember a “moment in time” of this horrible and brilliant time in my life.  Anita was great and we were there for hours and had a great time.  We agreed we should do all of the above after chemo so I can feel my most fabulous :-)

A lady had contacted me through this blog and I have been in contact with her all week she had a mammo and biopsy on Monday and unfortunately she was diagnosed with Breast Cancer on Friday.  I feel so sorry for her having to go through this shit but as I told her it’s all doable and you have no choice.  Also I was telling her she will be overwhelmed with all the support she will get from family and friends just like I did and still do.  It just seems to be so rampant at the moment or maybe its just because I have it that I hear of so many other people who have it.  Once again ladies I implore you next time down in docs get those boobs out and get squeezed sure you might as well get value for your €55 doctors visit.  You don’t actually need to go to the docs do it yourself and maybe one of these lads could help  ;-)

Well folks I am flying again and feeling on top of the world I just love feeling well and so appreciate the good days.   Only two more chemos left now, my last one is on the 14th March so I reckon I have two more weeks of feeling like crap and then by the end of March I will be chemo and pain-free.   I am so looking forward to finishing chemo and moving right along with the rest of this cancer trail.  Hoping to go on a holiday with the family for a week or so before the operation somewhere sunny – kids at a great age now to go on holidays with :-)    Also gonna have a finished chemo big night out bash so if anyone is interested in coming and raising a glass watch this space.

Good things that happened this week

  • Won the Competition for a complete makeover thanks DolledUp and Emer Hynes Denton and all you guys for voting for me
  • Getting a lovely mass said for me from Gerry Ball
  • Received really cool Female gift book and card – thanks Dymphna
  • Lovely Lovely Daffodil pressie from a neighbour
  • The cutest Paddy Featherstone had his 1st Birthday
  • Met Anita from and had lovely brekkie
  • I’m feeling goooooodddddd

That’s it folks enjoy this Sunny Sunday (NOT) and make love not war ;-)

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11 Responses to Finally its Fabulous February

  1. You’re not vain. Losing hair, lashes and brows affects all of us. The good news, of course, is that’s a temporary situation. Congrats on winning the Dolled Up Makeover!

  2. Anonymous says:

    I am so not observant..I didn’t even notice ur eyebrows and lashes were gone…but all my blonde friends complain when they spend 100 plus on their hair at the hairdressers and I never even notice…I suppose it’s like when u get a spot on your face, you always feel the whole world is zoned in on…anyway great u r feelin good…2 to go, can’t believe it..I’ll be at ur party ready to clink glasses with u…bring it on.xxxx

  3. Ger carroll says:

    Keep forgetting to log in when I…ger

  4. So glad you a bit better and sorry you felt bad. The end of your chemo not far away now – woo hoo!

    His nibs has had the last chemo more than a week ago but still nauseous, mouth ulcers, generally feeling bad – I think it may be because he is on the short sharp four drugs together (MVAC) but he is never better between the chemos. Still, hopefully now time to build him up when he can eat again, before his operation.

    Approaching the additional stress of financial insecurity now… something not mentioned much but a big issue for people with cancer… you have huge additional expenses (the HSE not being a truly free system at all) at a time when you are unable to work… it’s kind of like being kicked when you are down…

    A word also to anybody on chemo – even if you feel awful please remember to walk around regularly so you don’t end up like his nibs with deep vein thrombosis and a clot from it that went to his lungs – trust me this is not a complication you want… both the cancer and the chemo and the less active life combine to make it more likely.

    Enjoy coming to the end of the chemo Dee – and you are right: it is the worst of times and also the best of times…


    • Deirdre says:

      HI Micheell how you doing? Hope Tim is closer to his op now I cant remember when it was but I am sure it was close enough. Good comment about walking around no matter how lousy you feel – its so true you cant stay horizontal even if its only walking around the house get up and at it! Please keep in touch Michaelle and tell Tim I said hi!

  5. Anonymous says:

    You are fantastic. I lost a good friend this week too and it took an awful affect on me. She was only diagnosed with ovarian cancer three weeks ago, told on Monday there was nothing they could do and she died Tuesday night. It just made me feel vulnerable.

    • Deirdre says:

      Hi Mary sorry to hear about your friend that was awful and so fast too! I see you are doing much better now and getting yourself well after this cancer crap – sure you’ll be out and about donning your new hair style real soon!!!

  6. Mary says:

    Forgot also

  7. Sue Browne says:

    Great you deservedly won the competition Dee – and I’m delighted you’re feeling good – you are fabulous! Xx sue

  8. Jackie McEwan says:

    Sorry I’ve not replied for a while……hope you are feeling good and had a fantastic makeover, you deserve it….better days ahead….love Jackie and Alan xx