Ding Dong round Two of Chemo is a calling me. You would imagine that the morning of your chemo would be quite relaxed, you would be getting just yourself together and in form for the day ahead. Unfortunately this is not the case in a household with three (or should I say 4 children). Anyhow got out of the mad house in one piece and headed over to Kilmacud for my Taxi to Vincents.
Traffic was fairly heavy but I love driving in a car by myself its my time, no kids, no distractions just me and my thoughts. For years I never had music or radio on just loved the silence. Recently have become to love music its become a big part of my life so thank you music lovers for getting me into it. I have actually been offered a few spots on the radio as they have come to hear of my music skills and my late night DJ sessions
Dad dropped me off at Vincents arrived at 9.32 only two minutes late. When you go in first you have to check in of course then you are in a waiting room until you get called. Must say I find this waiting room pretty depressing, people look worried, anxious, asleep and nobody talks or even sort of acknowledges people. Around 17 people seated around in chairs I suppose all thinking about their chemo and their cancer worries.
Got the call around an hour later to do my bloods (Jesus could have had an extra hours kip!!). I was asking the nurse how I would know how my treatment is going, is there any progress report I get after each chemo? do bloods show them results of anything? the nurse (Claire) was a very nice nurse. I was saying about having a marker in my Boob from the first biopsy and how can that be measured – she said she would try find out for me. Took a while to find a decent vein to draw blood from so we had to try a couple of times. BINGO – finally got the blood so was free to leave for an hour while it got sent off by the chimney like apparatus that sucks all the bloods up a chute to the “vampires” who do their stuff. After having so much problems finding veins reckon being a junkie would not be the right path for me thank God.
(For anyone reading this I would say if you have a fear of needles cancer really isn’t the best disease for you as there are a lot of needles – trying something else like common cold, flu or man flu).
Off to Coffee Shop (do great coffee) pick up yet ANOTHER one of those buy nine coffees get one free and get my stamp so if I can manage to keep the card only another 8 coffees and I get one free. Have five different cards scattered around bag, car, house, jeans and bedroom. Organisation skills are defo not in my skill set. I must buy myself a purse, I am a cards (card) in pocket sort of girl and cash in another. I am sure organised women have compartments in their purses to keep all their cards safe, picture of kids, (partner if still on the scene) drivers licence, health cards, overseas health cards, drivers licence, blood donor cards, donor organ cards, Club Card, Supervalue Card, BT1 Credit Card. Maybe that’s one thing when I am better I will be more organised but then again if I was like that, then I wouldn’t be me, bit like in Ireland expecting a Dublin Bus to come on time and not to rain on Paddy’s Day
Mia’s turn to join me this time so we marched back up the Sick Cancer Waiting Room not a seat to be found, still no-one talking. Had to wait there for another hour, finally got called and got hooked up. Drip wasn’t working properly so they had to re-jab me and get a better vein! It’s a really busy place the chemo room I didn’t get one of the comfy chairs and only had a side view of the lovely golf course! Mia came back with some coffee for me (might as well enjoy the taste of it during chemo as takes shite after it!). Sandwich man came around so some ham and cheese sambos were devoured. Chemo bag changed onto next course which is infused by hand into the vein by the nurse. Lovely girl had a good chat with her but felt fairly pissed or something was talking crap (however I do talk a lot of that anyhow). Was talking to a lovely lady beside me who was on her last bout of Chemo told her was delighted for her and hoped she was going out to celebrate she started to laugh saying she was going to a funeral but would have one after
My doctor called me in to do a breast check so got unhooked both from the chemo and my bra. Clothes I was wearing not the best for taking off in a hurry and trying to open your bra to let someone feel your boob Ah sure I always had those kind of tops I hear a few of you say Anyhow she checked my breast and she felt that the tumour had got softer which was a good sign. Couldnt manage to put bra back on so she had to help. Managed to think of the three questions I had and got answers to them. I am ER Positive and HER2 Negative (this may mean something to some people I am still googling). Asked if I would have to have radio-therapy after op she said yes third question of course couldn’t remember. However she did look at me and say keep up that positive attitude as it’s doing you good!
Was moved onto comfy (leather look) armchair for my last two bags of poising got talking to a lovely lady called Liz we had a great laugh (I was still feeling pissed or dazed) we both got through our life stories in around thirty minutes. Really enjoyed the chat and the laugh. It’s so strange and in some way privileged to be in there to hear people talking about their cancers it’s incredibly humbling and inspiring to see people who really are sick but they are still so positive even through the really bad times. Both this time and last time there was a daughter who sat beside her mother all through the Chemo – yesterday it seemed like her Mam was in pain and she just gave her the biggest hug and let her Mam lay her head on her shoulder was one of those “moments in time” I mentioned last time that it was mostly women doing the talking that hasn’t changed not a word out of them (which is quite normal for men isn’t it?)
God I am nearly forgetting the best part of the day. I collared one of the nurses and asked if there was any results from the “marker” in my boob test. Five minutes later she came back and said that the tumour which was some medical calculation and the first time they took the measurement it was a 40.8 and now its a 38.1 – so I said that’s good news isn’t it? Absolutely she said that reading was taken after first chemo and basically it means that my body is reacting well to the chemo and that the tumour has reduced by around 5% I was ABSOLUTELY DELIGHTED with this news! Chemo is working and cancer is getting the shite kicked out of it.
Right finished for the day and Mia drove us up to Drommartin to get my drugs This time I will be better prepared and take my anti-sickness tabs from day one, also got prescription for anti-acid and heartburn which was the worst thing last time. Hopefully armed with these I wont feel as crap as I did the last time. Then I wonder back and think did I really feel sick or was it my imagination? I am not the one to over dramatise things and usually suffer in silence so think I was actually quite sick.
Back to the folks for some TLC and a sleepover (no kids) so nice and quiet. Parents are so funny guess what was on the menu chicken steaks and chips (Mam says they don’t usually do these they have more dinner sort of dinners). Gas the two of them out in the kitchen and making sure the chips were done properly. Mam comes back and said your Dad is unreal just whacks them in for 20 minutes sure they were still hard in the middle so she goes in and sorts it out. Now in my folks house quantity is always an issue. The tray of well-loved and well cooked chips came out. I said is that just for me she said “feck off what you talking about that’s for all of us” so think we got around 10-15 chips each and of course a chicken steak
Had an easy night was really really tired so headed to bed early. Double bed made up for me, heat on new PJ’s on the bed for me – ah this is the life! Crashed out around ten and was hoping would sleep the night but like before was up at 4am but managed to stay in bed (in between two toilet trips as was drinking more water than fell from Sandy last week) managed to stay in the bed and tossed and turned til six then up around 8ish.
Met great pal Emer Halpenny for brekkie down in Stillorgan SC had a great chat about everything. Emer had a lovely book and DVD for me about positivity, laws of attractions and gratitude. Emer knows I am not really into maybe “spiritual things” however I do have a great interest in positivity, fate, laws of attraction so looking forward to reading and looking at those. Laws of attraction by the way in case some people don’t know it is not boy likes girl and vice versa its good matches good, positives bring positives etc.etc. its all about how you deal with things. God maybe the drugs are kicking in!!!!
My God I really have rambled am tucked up in my bed with laptop on knee. Feeling very tired and mad red face from steroids oh yeah and a lovely hat to keep the baldy warm
Hope you all have a fab weekend …..oh yeah and have to have my good news bits now:-)
- Got a Healing Mass sent to me by Kay a friend of my Mothers from the Carmelite Nuns
- A lovely lovely card from Laura Brooks – thanks love the way you made it yourself
- Emer along with the other goodies gave me a “how to be adored” book all from fashion icons from movies etc – lovely flick through book
- Friends out running for me in “Run after Dark” in Phoenix park on Wednesday
- Mia did mammogram which I am sure will be fine and has been a sterling soul-mate all week to me
- Eilish Carney is knitting me some wooly hats
- My BFF Grainne Hartnett might be coming up to help me Monday/Tuesday and having a sleepover – plenty to do in this house Grainne – might tackle the different piles of paper and unopened post I have in every drawer of this house! Best of luck with it just pop me up a cuppa every now and again as I snooze upstairs
- A guy called Cameron von St James based in the US contacted me asking if he could write a post on this web about being a caregiver for his wife Heather who was diagnosed Mesothelioma which is a deadly form of cancer – see article
- Over 697 read my last blog – I mean HOW COOL IS THAT
Over and Out – once again am so extremely grateful for all your great support it’s helping me daily with dealing with these bastards!